No Excuses

A day late.  Yep, I was to have this blog entry ready yesterday, but as you can see I’m late.  I didn’t have the blog ready because it is Thanksgiving week.  Don’t ask me why this is an excuse but it sounded good in the moment.

Excuses are an amazing creation by the human intellect.

Dictionary Definition

  1. to regard or judge with forgiveness or indulgence; pardon or forgive; overlook (a fault, error, etc.)
  2. to offer an apology for; seek to remove the blame of
  3. to serve as an apology or justification for; justify
  4. to release from an obligation or duty
  5. to seek or obtain exemption or release for oneself

Ok you get the picture.  These are tiny words strung together to legitimize why you didn’t complete or execute something you were to do.  It is amazing the excuses people make.

I was never a prolific excuse maker but I did make a lot more when I was younger than I do now.

I understand why people make excuses, they don’t want to look bad or disappoint someone else for not completing something.

The only problem is, excuses do the same thing… only worse.  You still look bad and disappoint for non-completion but in addition, people come to expect nothing from you… except excuses.

He that is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else.

-Benjamin Franklin

But if you are the type who needs excuses let me give you a few tips.

Tips for Making Excuses

First of all it helps if you have some apparent personal reason for non-performance.  For example, Stupidity.  If you are stupid your excuses provide a higher degree of logic to the other person and thus create a greater natural tolerance.  Stupidity if used well goes a long way.  Frankly, some people are gifted at being stupid.  (Just take a look at the Jack Ass movies.)

Bad excuses are worse than none.
-Thomas Fuller

Another great tool for excuse making is procrastination.  Procrastinators are terrific at excuses because they have successfully mastered the ability to make excuses to themselves.   To a procrastinator excuses become an art form.  This level of procrastination requires a quick and logical mind to come up with seemingly logical reasons for not doing something.

But there is one more amazing perk for mastering procrastination.  Being a procrastinator provides one of the greatest excuses available… I didn’t have time.

The beauty of “I didn’t have time” is… it’s true (in a twisted sort of way).  The amount of time allotted was not sufficient to complete the task.  This allows the procrastinator to mentally salve their psyche which adequately shields them from the reality of their ineffectiveness.

I have one more tip for those who are prone to making excuses.  It really helps if you tie the excuse to something that touches an emotional cord with the other person.  It has to be something that strikes the empathic note on their heart.  It’s amazing what you can get away with if you can make people feel sorry for you.

The true excuse artists learn the subtle unique soft spots of the person they are trying to con.  But if you don’t know the person there are a few universal empathy points to exploit.

For example, you can never go wrong with a family illness, or something regarding children or animals, and throw in a hardship of some sort as a nice topping.  But don’t over do it… too much and you create suspicion.  As I said earlier, there is an art to making excuses.

I ran across a couple of quotes that I thought were interesting.

Life’s rewards go to those who let their actions rise above their excuses.
-Lee J. Colan, Orchestrating Attitude

No one ever excused his way to success.
-Dave Del Dotto

So, I am posting this blog on Tuesday instead of Monday because while I was caring for my sick grandmother, her cute little dog ate my computer mouse.

See you on Thursday, THANKSGIVING.

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