The Wall

Hi there… welcome back.

I hate to start off with bad news and be somewhat discouraging but…  we haven’t even started yet and we have our first challenge… the wall.

I finally decide to go on this adventure of discovery and wouldn’t you know, I ran smack dab into the garden wall.  Yep, and I hit it hard.  Bruised myself up a bit.

Facts about walls:

  1. They hurt when you bump into them.
  2. Everyone has them.
  3. Walls are not accidents.  Walls are intentional… built for a purpose.  They are created to keep things in or to keep things out.
  4. Here’s the scary one.  If not careful, the garden walls intended for good (protect and defend) subtly transform into the walls that trap rather than protect.  Without our knowledge we become imprisoned and we don’t realize our fate until we try to step beyond the parameter.
  5. You don’t go over or around walls… you go through them (more about that at another time).

Making the decision to step beyond the safety of the familiar is one thing, but actually taking a few steps is another.  I wrote the first two blog entries over five weeks ago and POW – I hit my wall.  The idea was to get six to ten blog entries in queue, release them on a schedule and this would allow me to get in a rhythm of writing.  Good plan huh?

What I didn’t plan on was my progress being hindered by the very walls I mentioned in the last blog entry… “what will people think?  will this be interesting? etc. etc. ad nausium.

It was easy to use the excuses such as the time consuming discipline needed to write and the commitment required to launch an ongoing blog.  Good excuses but in reality, it was the putting of my self at risk which stopped me.  I was rationalizing.

My definition of RATIONALIZE:  Rational Lies

But thank goodness, through the malaise the persistent soft piercing voice from beyond the wall (blog # 1) broke through.  I came to the realization that the fear of losing out on what is awaiting me is greater than the fear of the prison wall of what people think.  That is an awesome point of awareness.

Side Note:  Fear is an interesting paradox.  There is fear that debilitates and fear that motivates.  If not careful, fear becomes a seductive voice for non-action.

I bounced around in the confines of the wall far too long in my life.  Now that I am finally getting through my wall we can now proceed.

Ooops, I forgot… what about your walls?  Have you addressed the walls you have?

You can still walk along if you like but you’ll never really get to where you are going until you deal with your walls.  I don’t know the answer for you but I do know what I needed to do.  I needed to finally identify them for what they are.   A point of “Marking the Wall”.

This is what I needed to do.  If you are daring, I encourage you to mark your wall.  You can do it any way you want but you might want to consider posting it on the blog.  No one knows you… so think about it.

Rest well.  You’ll need it this Thursday for the next step of the journey.

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8 comments

  1. Hi Jerry. Just getting on to the site and loving it. Wow, I keep hearing that word “journey”. Uuummm…must be something to it. I admire your honesty and vulnerability. I too have been sensing a calling from within for “more”. On this journey, I’m finding that the “more” is of Him and He desires a deeper relationship with me. I’m determined to get into that inner chamber and discover His love for me…for the body of Christ. My journey is being filled with excitement, wondering and knowing that I’m supposed to be on this path. I’m finding out that there are some people just like me on the same road.

  2. O.k….I said I was all in, now I’m worried. What if I find that my wall is…I have to share my wall? I’m not sure I want to see it much less let others! We’ll see how I do…keep going guy.

  3. Betty, it’s okay to 1…be behind the wall, 2…not want to share or face the wall. I think we all have some skeletons in the closet, so to speak. But I also beleive that there is a plan for each of our lives-preplanned by God. I think He places certain desires within us to want to reach that destination. It’s also my opinion that we aren’t supposed to find our paths alone. (I’m very opinionated:) Come on, I’ll hold your hand and we can walk and talk together.

  4. Evelyn, thanks for offering to walk with me. I’d love the company. I know there is something stirring within, but it is a little scary…I sort of like my life right now..as is. But, this is a journey, right? Ok, my hand is stretched out now….

  5. Are there only women walking with you, Jerry? or are the men silent companions?
    I encourage you to keep walking and keep blogging. I like your style and I like your authenticity.
    You are making me think about my walls. I have them, I know. I think one of mine is–”I am not good enough.” Not sure good enough for what –probably a cousin to “Fear of what people think.”

  6. So far only women have commented. Hopefully there are some men hiding in the shadows… tracking me from afar.
    I appreciate your boldness to post on the wall. Way to go.

  7. I like the Myrtie Howell story. I don’t see many Myrtie’s though. My Mom is 82yrs old and she feels like life is done since she lost my Dad. There are so many people that could use her love and touch. But I guess you can’t motivate anyone else to be a Myrtie. or to keep climbing. They need to discover that themselves.

  8. I don’t see many either.

    I wrote about your comment in this most recent blog. Hopefully it helps some.

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