Love is in the Air

The many ways of love!

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Most of the topics I write on just seem to peek their way into consciousness and eventually take shape by bouncing around in my head for a while, then they finally pop out on the written page.

Yes, you guessed it, at times there can be quite a commotion in my head with all those ideas and thoughts bouncing around bumping into each other.  I have to say though, that I find my head pretty entertaining at times, cluttered but entertaining.

But on occasion there are topics that are thrust upon you.  Today is one of those topics.

I know I have a choice but, how does one not write about love on Valentine’s Day?

LOVE ALERT: Now don’t worry… I am going to talk about love but it won’t be a mushy, body tingling, cherub flying, love song playing, cupid shooting, bouquet toten, dove eyed dissertation on how it feels to be in love.

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It’s interesting to me how much love is measured by feeling.  But in reality the focus on feelings is just a reflection of the world we live in.  It seems that the approach to life these days is to cast aside reality and function on how something feels.

Descartes’ famous quote, I think, therefore I am” is rooted in raw logic.  If I think then I must exist.

In today’s world it seems the creedo is, “I feel, therefore it is.” Many see reality in terms of how they feel, and then act on that faulty logic.

Now don’t misunderstand what I am trying to say, there’s nothing wrong with feelings.  In fact, feelings make us human.  I don’t like to feel bad and I like to feel good.

Now what does this seeming attack on feelings have to do with love?  Loads.

First let me say that there are a lot of good feelings as it relates to love.  The feelings are strong, vibrant and energizing.  The feelings are so pronounced that love seems to be seared into our consciousness.

Let’s face it, we have all done some pretty silly things in the name of love.  But that’s the way love is.

But (and it’s a big BUT), if feelings tend to be our primary measure of love then we fall so very short of the deeper and more meaningful heart of love.

The feelings of love are what get our attention and gets us going, but the heart of love is sacrifice.

To my non-Christian friends: Don’t worry.  I am not trying to sneak in a Spiritual reference.  To be sure, there is no question that the issue of sacrificial love is central to our faith.

But the issue of sacrifice regarding love is something we all need to understand in relationships with others whether we are a Christian or not.  Personally, I believe there are a lot of deep Spiritual truths that are carried over into practical everyday life.

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The interesting thing about the feelings of love is that the focus is on self… how it makes me feel.  As long as we are feeling good and gooey it is easy to give to and be attuned to the other person.

When both people are feeling this way as a couple, they bask in the happy glow of tingly ecstasy.  Even as I write this is see doves flying overhead with ribbon, flowers budding from the ground, sun is shining and hear the Morris Albert song Feelings playing in the background… ah… love.

But at the heart of love is NOT self… but the other person.  Setting self aside and whether you feel like it or not… loving the other person.  This kind of love is a verb, an action verb.

Most people relate to this kind of love in regards to children.  Unconditional love that sacrifices.  But why is it so difficult to live this kind of love with another adult.

I know that sacrificial love can be very complicated and messy in real life.  I am sure that there have been times in my marriage when I’ve not been too lovable (I’m sure my wife laughed when she read this part).

But I do know this, it is heart love when you do things that you don’t want to do;  when you work on things about yourself that are difficult;  when you do the dishes when the other leaves the mess (oops, that just slipped out).

The interesting thing about the feelings of love, if you hang in there and engage in the sacrifice of love, the feelings of love come back different and deeper.

Have a Love-ly day.

See you Thursday.

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