Posts Tagged: change

Jan 11

Change Anyone?

Hi there. 

I start with a promise today.  I promise no burrito remarks.  My wife thought it might have been a bit over used in the last blog entry.  Frankly I don’t understand the concern.  I think there’s always room for a good burrito comment in any literary effort, don’t you? 

Okay, now to more meaningful endeavors.  As you know I have been talking about this “stirring” thing the past several blog entries.  Being stirred is one thing but what you do with it is another.

Thinking about doing something is easy.  It’s kind of like an emotional double shot of bourbon.  Thinking feels good for the moment and slowly dulls your senses to reality.  And before you know it the stirring has been put in its place and neatly tucked away till next time.

Anytime you embark on a journey that stretches you, it is a journey into the unknown.  But fair warning, the unknown has the power to paralyze. 

For me, I became paralyzed.  Usually the unknown paralyzes people because the natural default is to fill the void with negative scenarios.

I launched this blog January 4, 2010, but I started thinking about it for a good ten to twelve months before hand.  The fact that I was considering something that was so far outside my comfort zone paralyzed me.

You may be the type that throws yourself into new things pretty easily.  I envy you, I guess.  But there is something about venturing into those dangerous areas of life.  If you feel no danger then you may not be stepping out far enough.

If you truly step beyond yourself then failure is a legitimate likelihood.  You step into that realm and you will never be the same. 

            “A mind stretched to a new idea never returns to its original dimensions.”

            – Oliver Wendell Holmes


This is also true in regards to personal growth.  Stepping into something beyond us changes us.  You will never be the same.

Now this is where it can get really dicey.  When we change, things around us change.  It not because we are trying to change it intentionally but it occur naturally. 

Usually we try to change things by changing other people… this can be very messy.  Let’s face it; we don’t like it when people try to change us. 

I have learned a long time ago and my mantra has been change affects change

I change, things change.  We tend to be consumed with what changes other people need to make.  I believe more and more in the core of my being that I must be open to who and what I am and change where I need to change.

I change because it’s the right thing for the right reasons.  But changers beware.  When you change, people will want to force you back into the box that maintains their normalcy. 

This is where personal resolve of doing what’s right is tested. 

I am sure that I have shared this before but it is worth repeating.  I always heard that marriage required work.

I’m pretty aware and I don’t tend to be selfish so I thought the work will be things like trying to understand her needs or doing my share around the house. 

When things weren’t going smoothly I felt like she needed to change.  Boy was I wrong.  The work required in any marriage is on YOURSELF. 

If both people are working on themselves it makes a wonderful marriage, not perfect, but amazing.

So, if you are willing to step beyond yourself the rewards are magnificent. 

So I encourage you on your journey to step out beyond where you are.  Try something new, something that stretches you.

See you Thursday.  Burrito Boy… signing off.

P.S.  I just couldn’t help myself with the burrito comment.  And yes, I realize it was childish and silly.

Nov 10

Making A List


How was your Thanksgiving?  Good I hope.  The fact you are reading this blog it is safe to assume you survived your turkey coma.

Now that Thanksgiving has sailed past us, we now officially enter the Christmas season.  I like this time of the year.  For me it’s Christmas time but there are lots of great religious holidays during this time of the year.

I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up — they have no holidays.

- Henny Youngman

Regardless of your faith this is the time of year when everyone seems to have a holiday to celebrate.  Celebration seems to make everyone a bit more tolerant.  It’s hard to be happy and angry at the same time.

So now that its Christmas, it is time for the proverbial “list”.

I don’t mean to be arbitrary with my next statement but… you need to have a list and you need to make it early.

There are some people who play this, “Oh just get me anything” game.  They may be sincere but not having a list makes if really hard for people who want to buy them something.  Since this is the season of giving… give people a break and make it easier on them… give people a LIST.

I can talk about people like this because I was that way.  My usual quip was, “Oh just get me whatever you think.  I really don’t need much.”

Oh brother!  Give me a break.

This year has been different.  I made a list and it was like all my family took a collective sigh of relief.  They knew what I wanted and what to get me.  There is no guessing if I will like it or have to wonder if it is something I can (or will) use.

I didn’t realize how significant it was until they almost made my list an event.  They called it, The Unveiling.  So the list was unveiled before Thanksgiving (Black Friday sales) and it was quickly emailed to various family members.

This is a fun story about making a simple change.  But there is a truth here that has profound implications.

Like most things in life you learn the significance of something after you make a change.  If I had any idea how much this would have been appreciated and received I would have taken the time and energy and put some thought into creating a Christmas list years earlier.

But that’s the point.  We don’t know the impact or importance until after the change.  It’s as though our minds are clouded to reality.

Unfortunately much of the time the lack of changing simple things is because we don’t see the need or see it as a priority.  If we do see something as a priority to be changed then two reasons dominate – laziness and ego.

The lack of a Christmas list for me was primarily my lack of seeing it as important.  If I did see it as important then the issue for me would be one of laziness than ego (although my wife might argue that point).

Now if I want to be really honest, the creation of the Christmas list became important NOT because I thought it would be appreciated by my family but because there were some things I wanted that elevated the importance of the list.

Pretty self centered huh?  Hey, I never said I was perfect.

Well, I am learning and this journey I am on keeps getting more exciting.  A life open to growth is always invigorating and never gets boring.  But growth always demands change.

Change is the payment we make to grow beyond where we are.

Just so you know, I’m not a complete slug.  The Christmas list took on a different level of importance because I decided to take a risk.

Because of my desire to grow and stretch myself, the past six months has been very odd.  There has been something bubbling inside about taking up painting.  So I decided to give it a go.  So my list has all types of art supplies to get me started.

My goodness… me of all people.  I would have never guessed I would be writing as a creative outlet and also take the leap of trying to paint.  Fun stuff.

In a few months I will let you know how it is going.

Also, for you women who have men in your lives, I have a Christmas gift suggestion that you must take to heart.  I will share it Thursday.

See ya.