Posts Tagged: gift

The Journey Beyond — 3 Comments
19
Apr 10

Hidden Surprise

Hi there, welcome back.

It’s a good day to be on our journey.

One thing I love about this life journey we travel, are the surprises.  If you are open and on the look-out, you’ll see things others miss.

Side Note: Have you ever seen a photograph of something simple and ordinary that was transformed into a work of beauty.  The eye of the photo artist saw something that we did not see.

They took the picture and with a little cropping away of the portions that distract, they captured the center-point of beauty.  And we, the casual on looker, now enjoy the beauty only because the cluttered distractions are removed.

I want to be one who finds amazing things in what seems to be an ordinary day.  First of all, we have to realize that no day is ordinary and secondly that there actually exists the extraordinary amidst the clutter of life.

Today is a good day.  It’s not that I feel particularly good or happy.  I just happen to see a jewel in the clutter.

A friend of mine was in South Carolina all last week attending the funeral of her Aunt Georgia.  It was a time of celebrating a life well lived and reconnecting with extended family.

In the usual chit chat of talking about the funeral and reconnecting with the family I was shown the program of the funeral and the life of Mrs. Georgia.  The program had the typical things but it was there I found my jewel.

The family included sections I had never seen before in a funeral program.  The sections were…  Mrs. Georgia’s Memorable Phrases, Her Passions, and Her Lessons for Life.

I love homespun wisdom.  The profound is in the simple.

Sadly, homespun wisdom is being lost.  We live in a day and time of being bombarded with hype and glitz.  All the media phrases are focus group tested, polished perfect and spun with exacting precision.

But then you have someone like Mrs. Georgia who crossed my path via a funeral program.  Little did she know that one of her simple phrases of life would catch my eye and validate my desired approach to life.

Apparently she would say this phrase to her kids when they were considering life options.

“Go on until your road ends”

- Mrs. Georgia Etta Jones Wharton (1926-2010)

Simple, succinct and right on.  In six words there is a powerful message for each of us.

“Go” – be active, don’t sit on side of the road watching life go by

“Your road” – each of us has their own road to travel

“Ends” – our roads may be different length

I would hate to think that at my death I had more road to travel.  I want to travel light and travel well.

On my road today I found a jewel.  It has been a good day of traveling.

See you Thursday.

The Journey Beyond — No Comments
5
Apr 10

Scalpel or Hammer

Hello, I hope you had a very great weekend.

I am back on this Truth thing again today.  This topic seems to continue to grow.  I was planning to talk about how Truth transforms but I still have some things bubbling around inside about how Truth informs (you will need to read the last couple of blogs to really get a feel for what I am sorting through).

As I said, Truth is all around and continually bumping into us trying to get our attention.  It’s kind of like a thirteen year old girl who seems to “accidently” show up the same places of the boy she likes and is constantly trying to catch his eye.  He of course is daft and oblivious to her cues.

Truth pursues us and is constantly trying to catch our eye.  Unless we are looking for the cues we too stroll along missing the opportunity of a lifetime.

Truth wants our attention and sometimes the vehicle for Truth is another person.  Personally I don’t like it much when another person is involved.  People make things messy.

I would rather have circumstances teach me my lessons not people.  This is by far the best Truth delivery process for me personally.  With my finely honed awareness and keen insights, people pointing things out in me are not necessary… AT ALL.  Well, at least I don’t think so.

As I said earlier, people make things messy.  Circumstances don’t make judgments and they don’t argue.  There are no ulterior motives, emotional baggage, or sensitivities that need to be navigated.

Truth has power, tremendous power.  And Truth in the hands of another person is a scary proposition.

The problem is, people intuitively know the power of Truth and in the wrong hands truth is used to hurt vs. heal.

“I never gave anyone hell.  I just told the truth and they thought it was hell.”

- Harry Truman

Truth in the right hands is amazingly beautiful and powerful.  Truth pierces, it is surgical.  It may not be comfortable but it brings healing and produces freedom.

In hands of people with a wrong motive, Truth becomes a blunt instrument inflicting head or heart trauma.  This of course produces more injury and adds another stone to the bag of rocks we all carry (3/4/10 blog).  What the person is saying may have the core of Truth.  But it is lost in the clutter of motives and the noise of emotion.

Have you ever known someone who felt it was their duty to set people straight?    They project the notion that they are to be the messenger of fact and are obligated to make sure you know where you fall short.

Here is a very Important Point:  It is never our role to set people straight.

It is important to remember, we cannot transform others.  No matter how much we want to change a person we cannot.  In fact, us trying to change a person builds resistance.

There is no question that there are times when we are called to share truth.  It may be uncomfortable for the other person and difficult for us.  It is not easy offering a gift knowing that rejection is likely.

But love gives.  There is beauty and power in Truth purely offered, centered in love.  A gift of Truth given with no expectations… just given knowing that at some time the other person will open their hand and receive.

This is where the miracle occurs.  Truth transforms.

I don’t want to get into this now because this is what I will spend some time talking about in Thursday’s blog.

See you then.

The Journey Beyond — No Comments
25
Jan 10

Walkie Talkie

Wow… you’re back.  I wasn’t sure I would see you again after the last blog.  Welcome!  As I said in my first entry, I am taking this journey whether anyone joins me or not but its nice having the company.

Enough of the niceties, the mountain is calling, onward and upward.

Have you ever strolled along a secluded wooded path with someone?  There’s something about nature and a leisurely stroll that stimulates the senses, relaxes the mind and most especially opens the heart.  Laughter is free and conversation natural.

There is a subtle joy that seeps in as you slowly walk along with your head bobbing up and down… looking up and around at the beauty and then to the path at your feet to secure your next step.  This cadence with the surroundings does something to and in us.  Our guard tends to be lowered and casual conversation about the trees and beauty seamlessly (almost magically) transforms into dialogue about life.

Our deepest and most meaningful conversations are spontaneous, never contrived.  You cannot force deep interaction.  In fact force undermines the very virtue you seek.

Unfortunately deep meaningful conversations are the all too rare… those times when we feel comfortable enough with someone to expose our deeper self, the self below the obligatory niceties.

Side Note: My hallmarks of a meaningful conversation

  • Natural and fluid vs. forced and formal
  • Both are engaged, not one sided
  • Probing but not pushy
  • Questions but not challenging
  • Varied opinions but not judgmental
  • Focus is on my learning and insight vs. trying to change the other person

By the way, have you ever met someone who felt they needed to set people straight?  For what ever reason they feel it is their calling to let you know where you’re wrong or where you’ve failed.

Strange paradox…  deep conversations are not only for people we know.  The amazing thing to me is some of our deepest conversations are with total strangers.  Why is that?  I have my opinions but I would like yours.

I have had amazing conversations with people on planes.  The small seats, tight quarters and background roar of the engines suddenly disappear and your eyes, mind and focus are fixed.  Sadly, I must confess, many of my deepest conversations have been with people I have just met.

I have two other quick observations.  First, deep conversation is a gift of trust, and secondly they are remarkably intimate.

Hold on… I’m not talking about that kind of intimate.  Where is your mind going?  I’m not that kind of guy… you pervert.

Just kidding, just kidding… anything for a cheap laugh or to get a quick rouse out of someone.

You feeling it in your legs yet?  You know… the muscles begin to tighten as we walk up the mountain.  Thank goodness we’re still on a slight incline.  But the rough climbing is ahead as we begin our ascent.

Later… see you Thursday.

The Journey Beyond — 8 Comments
11
Jan 10

The Wall

Hi there… welcome back.

I hate to start off with bad news and be somewhat discouraging but…  we haven’t even started yet and we have our first challenge… the wall.

I finally decide to go on this adventure of discovery and wouldn’t you know, I ran smack dab into the garden wall.  Yep, and I hit it hard.  Bruised myself up a bit.

Facts about walls:

  1. They hurt when you bump into them.
  2. Everyone has them.
  3. Walls are not accidents.  Walls are intentional… built for a purpose.  They are created to keep things in or to keep things out.
  4. Here’s the scary one.  If not careful, the garden walls intended for good (protect and defend) subtly transform into the walls that trap rather than protect.  Without our knowledge we become imprisoned and we don’t realize our fate until we try to step beyond the parameter.
  5. You don’t go over or around walls… you go through them (more about that at another time).

Making the decision to step beyond the safety of the familiar is one thing, but actually taking a few steps is another.  I wrote the first two blog entries over five weeks ago and POW – I hit my wall.  The idea was to get six to ten blog entries in queue, release them on a schedule and this would allow me to get in a rhythm of writing.  Good plan huh?

What I didn’t plan on was my progress being hindered by the very walls I mentioned in the last blog entry… “what will people think?  will this be interesting? etc. etc. ad nausium.

It was easy to use the excuses such as the time consuming discipline needed to write and the commitment required to launch an ongoing blog.  Good excuses but in reality, it was the putting of my self at risk which stopped me.  I was rationalizing.

My definition of RATIONALIZE:  Rational Lies

But thank goodness, through the malaise the persistent soft piercing voice from beyond the wall (blog # 1) broke through.  I came to the realization that the fear of losing out on what is awaiting me is greater than the fear of the prison wall of what people think.  That is an awesome point of awareness.

Side Note:  Fear is an interesting paradox.  There is fear that debilitates and fear that motivates.  If not careful, fear becomes a seductive voice for non-action.

I bounced around in the confines of the wall far too long in my life.  Now that I am finally getting through my wall we can now proceed.

Ooops, I forgot… what about your walls?  Have you addressed the walls you have?

You can still walk along if you like but you’ll never really get to where you are going until you deal with your walls.  I don’t know the answer for you but I do know what I needed to do.  I needed to finally identify them for what they are.   A point of “Marking the Wall”.

This is what I needed to do.  If you are daring, I encourage you to mark your wall.  You can do it any way you want but you might want to consider posting it on the blog.  No one knows you… so think about it.

Rest well.  You’ll need it this Thursday for the next step of the journey.

The Journey Beyond — 10 Comments
4
Jan 10

A bottle in the ocean

My first blog entry.  Weird.

I kinda feel like an obscure speck somewhere in the universe putting a message in a bottle and throwing it into the cyber sea and wondering if anyone on a distant shore will by chance catch a glimpse of it and read the scribbled message.

Apparently you have happened upon this bottle and have read this far.  What now?  You can casually toss it to the side and continue cyber surfing or does something stir your curiosity.

Something intriguing that stays your attention.

Side Note*

Have you ever noticed how odd it is that for no apparent reason something seemingly ordinary stirs something below the surface?  It touches and moves you and we don’t know why.  We sense it and we tilt our head like a dog hearing a strange noise.

Pay attention.  It’s a gift.  Hopefully the mystery draws you to explore.

*Side notes are just random thoughts that hit me in mid sentence.  So I’ll throw them in.

Back to the cyber bottle… You may be wondering about the person on the other end of the message.  Who is this lost soul in cyber space?

Well… I’m just an ordinary guy.  Nothing too special… I’m a nice person, pretty good sense of humor (albeit weird) and insecure enough to worry too much about what people think.  I feel deeply, laugh freely, and usually keep a lot inside.  Don’t ask me why, I don’t really know… I just do.

I’m getting ready for a journey.  This is not your typical trip with suitcases, tourist brochures and cheesy sunglasses.  The journey is into the unknown, beyond the self I know and this blog is primarily the vehicle.

The journey is beyond the safe confines of the walled garden of self.  The familiar, safe, cozy world I live in.  But my comfortable world has been disturbed.  Something (or someone) is calling from beyond the wall.  My head is tilted and my curiosity peaked.

I’m not sure where I’m going.  I’m just going.  All I know is that I’m supposed to go on this walk.  Don’t ask me how I know… I just know.

The stir has been deep.  Something inside wanting out.  Not aggressive… more restless.   Something slowly waking up and beginning to poke at the confines of it’s environment.  Like someone cautiously pushing on a wall in a creepy old house to determine the strength and stability.

Feeling stirred is a gift.  There is a difference between being stirred and being troubled about something.  Invite the stirring to occur.  Let it grow, let it take shape, let it push and struggle its way to the surface.  It has to come out from within; I cannot get to it from the outside.  All I can do is nurture, invite and remove the obvious barriers that limit.

All I know is that something is stirring… and that’s a good thing.

The stirring has been the catalyst for this journey.  Anyone want to join me?  It would be nice to have company but I’m content going it alone.

Maybe your first step is to tag along for a while to see what it’s about.  Maybe you’ll just pop in every now and then to see where I am.  That’s ok too.  Whatever you decide to do is fine with me.

I want to ask… have you been feeling something begin to stir from the depths?  If so, I encourage you to be a bit adventurous.

Maybe I’ll see you on Thursday.  Ciao.